I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
