I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
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