Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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