the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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