haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
