people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
