I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
