I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
