It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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