it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
