just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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