you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
