So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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