I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
