A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
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