That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
