it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
