How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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