did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
try to milk me bitch
So. Much. Porn.
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