eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
