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i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
