I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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