you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
