I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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