K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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