But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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