I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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