we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
