Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize