I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
4 words: hood of his car
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
