Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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