your thong is hanging out like whoa
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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