I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
