You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
