I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize