The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize