The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
