They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
