Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
3 2 1 whiskey
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize