And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He has the fingertips of a God
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