i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
how drunk are you?
Several
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
