What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
