i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
