OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
