Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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