i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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