Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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