is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
