I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
