So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize