Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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