You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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