Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
